I recently read a quote in a book that stated, “The road you arrive on is never the road you start out on.” I wish I could remember which book because I’d like to attribute it to a specific author, but I’ve read several books in the past month, and I can’t for the life of me remember where the hell I read that quote. It might have even been something I heard on a podcast. I have no idea. All I know is that reading or hearing it was impactful enough that I scribbled it down on a scrap of paper and taped it to my desk.

Lately I’ve been very focused on the idea of living in alignment with my purpose. A few years ago, I didn’t even know what a “life purpose” was, at least not in those terms. When I became a cop, I knew I wanted to help people and make a positive impact in my community, but at the time, I don’t think I necessarily thought of the job as my purpose in life. I never really stopped to think about “why” I was so compelled to be a public servant, especially when that lifestyle wasn’t something I was really exposed to growing up.

I didn’t have any law enforcement officers, firefighters, or active duty military influences in my family, and if you’ve read my past blog posts, you’ll know that I certainly wasn’t an “alpha” female growing up or athletically inclined in any way. My careers in both the fire service and law enforcement were uphill battles where I was constantly pushing myself out of my comfort zone and facing struggles with skills and abilities that didn’t come naturally to me. I certainly would have had an easier time of it if I’d stayed in an office job or pursued a more undemanding creative career path. So, why did I go against the grain of my natural abilities and decide to pursue these public service careers?

There was a point in my life where I would have said it was for the challenge aspect of the jobs, but realistically, if I just wanted a challenge, I could have done more mud runs or taken up some stimulating hobbies. I didn’t need to put myself in job positions where I risked my life every day to protect and serve other people. And I sure as fuck didn’t need the mental, emotional, and psychological stress that comes with being a cop.

When I left LAPD, I gave up a highly coveted position that I worked my ass off for years to achieve because I felt like I was no longer making a difference in my community, due to external political circumstances well beyond my control. I could have easily laid low and stuck it out until I was eligible to retire, as many of my friends and coworkers were doing. By this time in my career, the department had shifted away from proactive enforcement, and the unit I was working in had basically been turned into a community service prop anyway. Why not just go along for the ride and reap the benefits of great medical insurance, a steady paycheck, and a pension without having to do any hard work?

Instead, I was so passionate about being a cop that I moved to another state and started over in the same career field, believing I could still make a difference in another community. My only mistake was doing so in Washington, a state with a government system that is even worse than California when it came to lack of support for law enforcement officers and blatant disregard for holding criminals accountable for their actions. Yes, it seems I was indeed so blinded by the beauty of western Washington that I failed to do my due diligence in researching the state’s extreme far left policies. Plus, my bestie had moved there a couple years prior, and I was missing the hell out of her, so it seemed like a great idea at the time.

It was during this stage of my life that I started learning about the Law of Attraction and diving into the concept of purpose. I realized that every self-development and entrepreneurial book I read (and there were many…) talked about the importance of finding your “why” and the critical need to have a purpose that contributes to the greater good of others. It started to dawn on me that I had pursued a career in public service because my “why” in life is to make a difference and have a positive influence on other people’s lives.

Purpose is an all-encompassing concept that impacts all areas of a person’s life, including their physical, mental, and emotional health. Research consistently shows that without having a purpose in life, people become stagnant, unhappy, and unfulfilled. In contrast, people who do have a sense of purpose are generally happier and overall more satisfied with life, even when facing adversity. People who live in their purpose are doing what they love, and in doing so, they automatically accomplish goals that benefit and serve not only themselves, but others as well.

When the “Defund the Police” movement was at its peak, I was so upset and angry all the time that it started affecting my health and well-being. I was at a place in my career where I had my dream job as a detective, and I can say with all honesty that I was damn good at it, but as anti-law enforcement sentiment continued to spread across America, I started to dread going to work every day. I felt helpless watching my state and my country turn to shit, while seeing firsthand how people were becoming more frequent victims of crime, with no recourse for justice. I was working in a job where I was supposed to be protecting people, but I was restricted from actually doing so because of illogical policies and laws designed to protect criminals instead of innocent people.

As more and more casework came across my desk, I felt like it was pointless to be investigating crimes that were never going to be prosecuted, giving false hope to the victims and wasting law enforcement resources. I couldn’t publicly speak out or voice my beliefs and opinions, and I realized I was no longer honoring my purpose. Like the end of a bad relationship, I had fallen out of love with being a cop. So, once again, I gave up a highly coveted position and left law enforcement for good.

For the first few months, I felt excited to have this newfound sense of freedom and the unrestricted ability to speak my mind. One of the first things I did when I got settled in Texas was write a very lengthy Instagram post about freedom and why I left my career. It felt so amazing to be able to publicly share my opinions, but once the novelty wore off, I started to become a bit depressed. I began feeling like I no longer had a purpose since I wasn’t in a career field anymore where I had the responsibility to be a force for good and positively impact people’s lives.

However, true purpose provides clarity and direction, and when you are fully aligned with your purpose and you have a passion for it, the Universe has a way of placing the right people, resources, opportunities, and circumstances into your life. This is what happened to me with the chain of events that started me on the path to writing this blog and creating the “Unapologetically Outspoken” platform.

First, Gary Collins came into my life, re-awakened my creativity, and gave me an opportunity to speak out by writing blog articles for his website. Several months later, I felt compelled to reach out to Stephanie Keith for advice about getting more aligned with my purpose, and after reading some of my articles, she encouraged me to start writing my own blog. I’ve always been sadly inept at anything involving computer technology, and I had no idea how to create a blog website. The idea seemed absurd to me. However, without me even asking, my awesome friend Lexi took it upon herself to create my logo and website, and she gave me a tutorial on how to navigate WordPress. A few weeks later, Stephanie and I simultaneously came up with the idea to start the “Unapologetically Outspoken Podcast” together. At first, I felt completely uncomfortable and out of my element, but now I love it, and I actually get excited to record episodes. How crazy is that?

A year ago, I never expected I would be writing weekly blog articles or speaking out publicly doing podcasts with Stephanie three times a week. I never expected I would be spending 90% of my free time doing research to stay current on politics and world events. I never expected I would find a new life purpose that was equally, if not more, fulfilling than being a cop. But here I am. And it feels fucking amazing.  

My nearly 15-year law enforcement career is something that I will always be proud of because I know I joined the job for the right reasons, and I know I did make a difference in some people’s lives. But now I also know that I’m destined to do something even more impactful in this world. And I know that if I continue down this path of being fully aligned with my purpose and trying to inspire others with my writing and the podcast, the Universe will continue to provide me with the right people, resources, and opportunities for success.

The road I have arrived on is definitely not the road I started out on. And I know this road still has curves and intersections up ahead that will carry me to even different destinations. Sometimes it’s scary not knowing where I’m headed, but it’s also really fucking exciting. The one thing I’m sure of is that the Universe has my back, so I’m trusting my instincts and looking out for all of the unexpected signs and detours along the way. So far, it’s been a hell of a ride, but I know this adventure is really just beginning, and I can’t wait to see what’s around the next corner.

Unapologetically Outspoken,

Tara